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Championing Self-Discipline in a Child's Sports Journey

Updated: Jan 2, 2024



Our Youth Development articles are meant to create awareness for all of the incredible ways kids can develop from youth sports. The goal is to help people notice the wide range of development that is happening during youth sports along with noticing performance and results. If you see development happening, even during poor performance or poor results, it can give you the power to make the most of the experience and align with your personal priorities in youth sports.


In this article we will discuss (1) What are the key skills that lead to self-discipline and what are the ways kids develop it through youth sports (2) Why self-discipline is so valuable at the different stages of life and (3) How to create and participate in youth sports experiences to best enable kids to develop self-discipline. If you find this all too much, read the cliffs notes or just skim each section. If you want to deeply learn this and incorporate it into youth sports, please spend the time to review, re-read and comment. If you want us to create a program for you that does all of this, please submit a request.


Summary of Learning Self-Discipline through Youth Sports


Imagine your child effortlessly navigating the challenging maze of academic exams, their calm and focused demeanor a testament to their self-discipline. In this blog post, we delve into the world of self-discipline, guiding you through the vital components that lead to your child's flourishing academic and personal life.


Unlocking your child's full potential isn't just about the skills they acquire on the field; it's about fostering a holistic development that stretches beyond sports. From maintaining a consistent practice schedule to mastering the art of delayed gratification, self-discipline is the bedrock upon which every great athlete is built and enjoyable lives can be forged. In this blog post, we delve into the essential facets of self-discipline, how youth sports provide an ideal arena for nurturing these qualities, the far-reaching benefits of cultivating unparalleled self-discipline, and the specific, actionable strategies that empower young athletes to unlock their potential. Keep in mind that self-discipline requires tremendous patience since by nature kids won't have complete self-discipline until the end of their journey. In this spirit, the hardest thing to do is to prioritize their self-discipline over the benefits that you might see in forcing discipline upon them. Be careful as doing so might sacrifice their long-term development of self-discipline. Hopefully this blog will add to your lens to make the decisions of where to drive discipline and where to drive the development of self-discipline.


What Does it Mean to Learn Self-Discipline and What Skills Are Needed?


Self-discipline is the ability to control one's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in order to achieve specific goals and maintain a sense of purpose and focus. In the context of youth sports, the development of self-discipline is essential, as it instills important life skills that extend beyond the playing field. Here are the core elements and capabilities that children can cultivate through sports, promoting self-discipline and personal growth:

  1. Goal Setting: Setting specific, achievable objectives in sports enhances self-discipline by teaching kids the power of a clear purpose and developing the skills to define purpose. With clear purpose it is much easier to be self-disciplined. Example: a young swimmer setting a goal to improve their lap time and deeply understanding why they have that goal, and using that goal as a way to drive their self-discipline to stick to the plan to achieve that goal.

  2. Time Management: Learning to allocate time effectively in sports and other responsibilities fosters self-discipline by instilling the importance of prioritization and commitment, like a student-athlete managing their schedule to find time to practice on their own at home, rather than playing video games.

  3. Delayed Gratification: Resisting immediate rewards improves self-discipline by teaching children to value long-term benefits over short-term pleasures, promoting patience and persistence, such as a baseball player waiting for the ball to arrive at the plate before swinging and keeping their eye on the ball rather than wanting to see where it goes before contact.

  4. Self-Motivation: Cultivating intrinsic drive in sports builds self-discipline by making children self-reliant and persistent, even when external motivations wane, such as a young track athlete finding personal satisfaction in setting new personal bests and continuously pushing themselves to improve.

  5. Accountability: Taking responsibility for one's actions strengthens self-discipline by reinforcing the importance of personal integrity and commitment to one's responsibilities, as seen when a soccer player stays on their side of the field waiting for their teammates to win the ball and play it to them, rather than abandoning their space.

  6. Self-Reflection: Continually evaluating one's progress and adjusting strategies enhances self-discipline by promoting self-awareness, adaptability, and a commitment to improvement, demonstrated by a gymnast reviewing videos of their performances to analyze their form and identify areas for enhancement.

  7. Emotional Regulation: Managing emotions in sports enhances self-discipline by ensuring that children remain composed, focused, and capable of making informed decisions, even in high-pressure situations, such as a young golfer remaining calm and collected on the final hole of a tournament to make a crucial putt.

Why Is Self-Discipline so Valuable Throughout Life?


The self-discipline skills developed through youth sports lay the foundation for success and personal growth in the near-term, ensuring thriving childhood experiences, while also providing valuable advantages in the medium and long term as individuals excel in academics, career, community involvement, and family life.


As a Child, Self-discipline skills offer immediate benefits that extend to the most important areas in a child's life. Beyond the realm of youth sports, these skills enhance personal relationships, education, family dynamics, happiness, and the ability to embark on adventures and exploration. Children who cultivate self-discipline are better equipped to manage their time effectively, setting aside dedicated moments for academics and spending quality time with family and friends. They can also approach challenges with a resilient and determined mindset, which not only serves them well in sports but also in various aspects of life. The ability to regulate emotions and make informed decisions contributes to greater happiness, as children learn to handle stress and pressure with composure. Self-discipline empowers them to embark on new adventures and explore opportunities with a sense of purpose, making it an invaluable skill for thriving in childhood and beyond.


In Early Adulthood, The self-discipline skills discussed in this chat offer invaluable advantages as children transition into college age and their early professional years. The ability to set and pursue goals with determination, manage time effectively, and practice delayed gratification continues to pay off in academics and career development. College life demands structured time management and resilience, which are skills honed through youth sports. These capabilities help students excel in coursework and extracurricular activities, preparing them for the rigorous academic challenges of college. Moreover, the skills of self-motivation, accountability, and self-reflection empower young adults to navigate the complexities of early professional life. They can tackle projects with intrinsic motivation, take ownership of their responsibilities, and adapt to new challenges through ongoing self-evaluation. In this way, self-discipline skills, learned through youth sports, prove to be instrumental in shaping successful college experiences and early professional years, providing a strong foundation for personal and career growth.


For the Long Haul, The self-discipline skills acquired during childhood and nurtured through youth sports continue to yield significant benefits as children transition into adulthood. These skills serve as a strong foundation for personal and career growth, enabling individuals to thrive in various aspects of life. The ability to set and pursue meaningful goals, manage time effectively, and practice delayed gratification bolsters career development and the pursuit of diverse interests. Self-discipline instills the habits of self-motivation, accountability, and self-reflection, which empower individuals to excel in their chosen careers, build a strong sense of community through teamwork and collaboration, and nurture meaningful relationships within their families. In adulthood, these skills prove invaluable in achieving personal and professional success while also fostering community togetherness, personal development, and a fulfilling family life.


How to Design a Process for Developing Self-Discipline in Youth Sports.


For those of you that are very process-oriented, here is a logical progression model that illustrates how kids can best develop their self-discipline.

  1. Winning Creates an Initial Frame of Reference: Whether it's winning a game, a tournament, or aiming for a winning record throughout the season, victory serves as a straightforward benchmark that children readily comprehend and aspire to attain. ''Kids, we'll give it our best to develop our self-discipline skills to help us win as much as possible. How does that sound?'' Whether winning is the most important thing to you or not, this approach will lead to a better chance to win and will maximize the development of these skills for lifelong benefits.

  2. Break Winning into Pieces: In order to pursue winning in most sports, kids need to be good at goal setting, time management, delayed gratification, self-motivation, accountability, self-reflection, and emotional regulation. Explain to the kids (in simple terms) how developing these skills will help their self-discipline and thus their performance. Create ways and cultivate focus and emphasis to develop these skills.

  3. Cultivate these Pieces: Concentrate with intent on developing the kids' goal setting, time management, delayed gratification, self-motivation, accountability, self-reflection, and emotional regulation, and make the parents aware that this is a part of your focus. Do drills that incorporate all the different self-discipline development needs. Celebrate when they improve or work to improve or show success in any of these areas. Emphasizing this brings awareness, which will foster intrinsic intent and a desire to improve in these areas of self-discipline. Make each individual's past performance the benchmark for them so they strive to continuously improve.

  4. Self-Discipline Starts to Show Results: The kids start experiencing the reward of goal setting, time management, delayed gratification, self-motivation, accountability, self-reflection, and emotional regulation. Connect these dots for them. Help them deeply appreciate that their self-discipline skills are happening and it matters. It helps them play better, get more action, win more plays, and enjoy the sport better.

  5. Self-Discipline Becomes Natural: The kids get such joy out of the rewards of their continuous goal setting, time management, delayed gratification, self-motivation, accountability, self-reflection, and emotional regulation development that they start to intrinsically drive continued improvement without the coach needing to emphasize it as much. They start becoming intentional about continuing to develop their self-discipline...ultimately for the love of the experience of honing the skills that give them the self-discipline to thrive.

How Can General Approaches Help Kids to Develop Self-Discipline?


In the pursuit of fostering self-discipline in young athletes, it's essential to employ a combination of training methods, communication strategies, and practical activities that cater to their unique needs and motivations, ensuring their comprehensive development on and off the field.

  1. Goal-Oriented Training: Emphasize goal setting as an integral part of sports training. Encourage kids to set specific and achievable goals for themselves, whether related to improving skills, achieving a target score, or mastering new techniques. Use S.M.A.R.T as a framework for productive goal-setting. Implement drills and activities that align with these objectives, fostering a sense of purpose in practice and games.

  2. Structured Time Management: Teach the importance of time management by reviewing the agenda with kids and the rational behind each piece, including water breaks and explain why it is important to stick to the schedule and how they can help the team to stay on time. Incorporate routines that promote efficient use of time during practices and games, ensuring they understand how to allocate their efforts effectively.

  3. Delayed Gratification Games: Design drills and activities that require kids to practice delayed gratification, resisting immediate rewards in favor of long-term benefits. These exercises instill patience and persistence, such as setting up challenges where success comes after consistent effort and practice.

  4. Intrinsic Motivation: Cultivate self-motivation by connecting the sport to personal satisfaction and intrinsic rewards. Encourage kids to find joy in setting personal bests, achieving personal goals, and continuously pushing themselves to improve. Focus on their interests and passions within the sport to drive self-motivation. Avoid instilling external motivation. This will cause them to rely on external and not develop internal motivation.

  5. Accountability Through Teamwork: Promote accountability by emphasizing the role of each player in the team's success. Encourage kids to take responsibility for their actions, whether it's following team strategies, adhering to rules, or acknowledging mistakes. Team-based activities and discussions can reinforce this sense of collective responsibility.

  6. Reflective Learning: Foster self-reflection by incorporating regular reviews of performance. Encourage kids to analyze their progress, identify areas for improvement, and adjust their strategies. Use video analysis and discussions to help them develop self-awareness and adaptability.

  7. Emotional Regulation Training: Teach emotional regulation skills through exercises that help kids manage their feelings during high-pressure situations. Create scenarios that mimic game-day stress and guide them in maintaining composure and focus. Adapt communication approaches based on each child's emotional needs to ensure they stay engaged and learn effectively.

Top 7 Specific Tips and Tricks to Help Kids Develop Self-Discipline through Youth Sports.


In the pursuit of instilling self-discipline in young athletes, these specific tips encompass a range of practical strategies, drills, activities, and communication approaches to effectively implement the seven core recommendations, fostering comprehensive personal and athletic development.


  1. Goal-Oriented Training: "Goal Achievement Journal" - Provide each young athlete with a "Goal Achievement Journal" to regularly write down their specific goals and the steps required to achieve them. In team discussions, encourage athletes to share and discuss their goals, creating a supportive environment for goal setting and achievement.

  2. Structured Time Management: "Time Block Challenge" - Introduce the "Time Block Challenge" during practices. Each practice session is divided into time blocks representing different drills or activities. Athletes must manage their time within these blocks efficiently. Encourage them to carry these time management skills into their academic and personal life.

  3. Delayed Gratification Games: "Progress Passport" - Create a "Progress Passport" for each athlete, where they earn stamps or badges for completing specific drills or challenges consistently. Set up quarterly reviews, and if they have accumulated enough stamps, reward them with recognition, such as leading warm-ups or choosing practice activities, instilling the concept of long-term rewards.

  4. Intrinsic Motivation: "Passion Showcase" - Design a "Passion Showcase" activity. Athletes have the opportunity to demonstrate and teach their favorite skills or techniques to their teammates. Celebrate their unique interests within the sport, reinforcing the joy of personal achievement and self-motivation.

  5. Accountability Through Teamwork: "Responsibility Roster" - Implement a "Responsibility Roster" within the team. Each week, assign a different player the responsibility of ensuring that everyone follows team strategies, rules, and safety measures. This shared accountability emphasizes the role of each player in the team's success.

  6. Reflective Learning: "Game Tape Review Clubs" - Establish "Game Tape Review Clubs" where small groups of athletes regularly watch and analyze game footage together. They discuss their performance, set goals for improvement, and track their progress, fostering self-awareness and adaptability.

  7. Emotional Regulation Training: "Stress Scenario Simulation" - Introduce "Stress Scenario Simulation" during practices. Create scenarios that mimic high-pressure game situations. Athletes practice emotional regulation techniques like deep breathing and visualization to stay composed. Adapt your communication approach based on each athlete's emotional needs, ensuring they remain engaged and learn effectively.

In conclusion, the journey to nurturing self-discipline in our children is a path paved with intention, dedication, and understanding. By recognizing the fundamental components of self-discipline, utilizing sports as a platform for growth, and embracing the impact this life skill can have, we set our children on a trajectory toward success. Through a combination of general principles and practical tips, we can empower them with the lifelong skill of self-discipline, opening doors to achievement and fulfillment in all aspects of their lives. Let us embark on this journey together, guiding our children toward a brighter and disciplined future.

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